Presence and old age

The loneliness of old age could be combated by the creation of objects, allowing the elderly to preserve their presence for themselves and others, thus restoring meaning to their social lives.

The Symptom of Age

The elderly must face a rather serious symptom: loneliness. The absence of social ties—or rather, their extreme scarcity—is partly due to the fact that their social network consists either of deceased individuals or those who have lost mobility and can no longer easily maintain social relationships with them. Today, digital tools could help, but they remain underutilized. Moreover, talking on the phone or via video calls all day does not constitute the most fulfilling social interactions.

The elderly thus suffer from isolation, which I call a symptom because it is like an external illness, yet perhaps also internal in some way—tied to their lifestyle, their way of being, from which the symptom arises: isolation, loneliness, and a sense of being disregarded by others.

The Missing Object

And indeed, what can we build, while we are in the “active phase of life,” with these very elderly individuals? Of course, we can exchange stories, gather testimonies, and learn from their experiences, but we can only do this once, twice, three times... It’s not enough. It remains relatively one-sided because these very elderly individuals can only offer us things from their life memories. But what can we give them in return, aside from our presence and the exchange we share? There is transmission, but what’s missing is a shared object of construction. It remains a dual relationship: I share my memories with you, and you are enriched; I share my presence, which connects you to life because, thanks to me, you are no longer alone.

What we do with other people, whether in personal or professional contexts, is create external objects—contributing to a professional project, going on outings together, etc.

True Empathy

Thus, what harms the very elderly is their loneliness, which is nearly impossible to resolve—unless we place them in the company of robots, which has proven somewhat effective and has been tested for several years. This will likely become even more common as these objects become more empathetic, even if we might attribute to them a false empathy.

In reality, empathy depends on what humans project onto the object. It’s the same with animals. A young animal, for example, interacts with us in its own way, but we use it to cultivate our own humanity, of which it is unaware. It is present in its animality, not in our humanity. There is thus a great deal of projection of our humanity that creates our sense of its empathy toward us. It will be almost exactly the same in our relationship with machines.

Presence in the Object: Personal, Social, and Desiring

I share here a reflection in the form of a proposal to improve the fate of old age. I propose the concept of presence to oneself in the object. What very elderly people who feel lonely lack is their presence in an object—whether painting, writing, singing, or any other creative object: knitting, driving, video games, etc. It is about investing oneself in the creation of an object external to oneself.

And for elderly individuals to engage in productive activities, they likely need to have prepared for it long before reaching very old age, as these activities require cognitive functions, activation of certain brain regions, and risk-taking. We venture to discover ourselves in our relationship to objects outside our bodily envelope. But even if this was not anticipated before entering old age, it can absolutely be cultivated, and new neural connections can emerge at any age—we’ve known this for quite some time now.

Thus, fostering autonomous creativity, rooted in personal desire for people of all ages—but especially the elderly—will have benefits in two complementary and indispensable aspects:

• On one hand, the fact that this person is present to themselves through the creation of external objects gives their life purpose: making something outside themselves that can be received by others. It is a mediating object for oneself and for others. The value of creating an external object is that the other person who appropriates it—reads, looks at, listens to, touches it—is completely free, not trapped in a dual relationship. This object, as a third element, allows both parties to be enriched by it.
• On the other hand, and this is very important, this external object enters a community of similar objects. For example, someone who embroiders will encounter the community of other embroiderers, whether directly in a local embroidery club or via social media—perhaps by sharing photos of their work and discovering others’.

Work: Always Socializing

Thus, this presence to oneself, thanks to the object that connects with other similar objects, also fosters social relationships—meaning, a sense of purpose. This is the question of work. We too often conflate work and employment. Once people retire, they feel useless because of this confusion. And we know very well that retired people can remain useful—by babysitting grandchildren, for example, or engaging in other activities, volunteering, etc. But all this requires energy, which not everyone has, depending on their physical abilities and lifestyle.

Therefore, when elderly people invest in creating external objects, they do so at their own pace, in their own singular way. There is no initial social pressure to engage in object-making. Presence to oneself via the object allows one to continue giving meaning to life, ensures these external objects gain meaning in relation to one another, and thus allows the very elderly to integrate into a meaningful social network—into work, into truly free and enriching activities for the social space and for others.

Creation: Taken Seriously

In my opinion, one of the great keys to addressing mental health in old age is personal creative work, which—via the created object—enables a relationship with the collective, thanks to this third function of the object. And note: I do not mean recreational practices dismissed as mere pastimes. I mean creative practices that are essential for oneself—objects that allow us to reveal ourselves first to ourselves.

One might object that not everyone has a creative soul and that this proposal cannot suit everyone. I strongly disagree, and my extensive experience across many domains and with many “audiences” proves it. Every person has things to express; every person gains immense personal benefits from their own expression; and every person can enrich others through their expression. No expression is without value. The only barrier is fear—something everyone experiences.

But once people are encouraged and take their expression seriously—meaning, once their expression meets the gaze of others—it enters reality. It is no longer “occupational therapy” to stave off boredom; these are objects that enrich others, quite simply.

This is easy to say, but it is a long journey because people lack self-confidence. Thus, guidance through creativity—developing one’s perspective, one’s subjectivity—is infinitely enriching, as people gain confidence and create things that truly enrich others.

The Meaning of Life

What gives life meaning? Being useful to others, because we are social beings. What do the elderly say causes them so much suffering? “I am useless,” because they no longer have children or grandchildren to care for—and even if they did, they lack the strength.

Thus, inventing these spaces, this confidence for the elderly, will change their lives—and also change the lives of many others, as countless people will be enriched by these creations.

Transcending the Amateur/Professional Divide

This requires completely rethinking the amateur/professional dichotomy, which is so problematic because it assumes a hierarchy in creations. It is a humanistic scandal, as it casts a veil of contempt over all non-professional productions. And this harms everyone without exception: those forbidden from expressing themselves (the vast majority, elderly or not) and all those who cannot receive what the elderly—and others—have to offer, whether amateur or professional.

Many examples illustrate this, but the most important thing, if one is facilitating such dynamics, is to resist a kind of well-intentioned miserabilism that would attribute incompetence or apparent debility to the elderly. Some might argue that certain individuals are truly beyond capacity and that only “occupational” activities are possible. This is absolutely false. They are “beyond capacity” due to damaged neural connections—but cultivating these connections can revive them. And the earlier we engage in this “cultivation of neural connections,” the more it reawakens the sense of life lived in presence to oneself, the object, and others. It is never too late.

Evaluating Creative Actions

In terms of evaluation, if we bring creations by the very elderly into contact with others—even if the elderly seem unaware of what is happening, or that others are enriched by their work—this is no reason to stop. It becomes a form of “art brut” that others can receive. For two reasons:

• First, we likely do not perceive everything these individuals experience internally. Even if we don’t see it, they may have received something from it. Our perceptions are limited to explicit signs.
• Second, even if the creators seem to gain nothing, others do receive something from these creations. Thus, in the end, in human exchange and collective construction, it will have contributed to others’ enrichment. So why deprive ourselves of this potential enrichment, even if it comes from seemingly unaware individuals?

In the Light of Nature

It’s like admiring a beautiful natural landscape. The landscape is not conscious of what it offers us. We decide to be enriched by it, and it can be profoundly moving. Why deny ourselves this enrichment? Our humanity is at stake in how we engage with things external to us—things that, a priori, do not interact with us. Yet we are still enriched, expanding our humanity, perceptions, and narratives about the world.

Thus, I advocate for a strong development of creativity—artistic or otherwise (no value judgments here)—for old age, in a real sense, not as mere occupation.

This requires deconstructing many preconceptions, but it will be immensely enriching for both beneficiaries and facilitators. It will challenge our views of social roles and even our self-perception as professionals. We might feel threatened, even in competition with the elderly—leading us, unconsciously, to diminish their contributions to retain our own power.

Implementation

Thus, encouraging creativity—always and for all—is, in my view, a key to mental health at any age, and society will emerge all the richer for it. But how can we take seriously someone we perceive as inferior in capacity, intelligence, speed, or efficiency? How can we imagine they are capable of creativity?

I myself have often led creative workshops for the very elderly, people with physical and mental disabilities, children, and all kinds of individuals. And every time, I observed extraordinary enrichment—for the participants as well as for myself. I have received as much, if not more, artistic value from these “anonymous” creations (by those who feel illegitimate) as from professional artists.

What I’m saying is this: once people are empowered to express themselves, all human beings have immense gifts to offer others. That is the power of creativity. We can be enriched by high culture, popular culture, or the culture of our neighbor—as long as we make space for it. Because if we see our neighbor only as someone to greet in the morning, we might miss all the ways they could enrich us and others—ways they themselves may not even realize.

Horizontal Mediation

This is why mediation is absolutely essential—but respectful, horizontal mediation, convinced it has as much to receive as to give. We can change the world, here and now, by creating respectful frameworks that empower people to express themselves. The path may be long, but it is vital to value every expression, even the most fragile.

What does it mean to “give value”? It means positioning oneself to receive what the other offers. Even something they are unaware of—a poem, the shaky way they hold a camera—we can receive something from it. Dare to embrace the most fragile expressions, let go of the fantasy of mastery, of an art whose value lies in technicality or aesthetic, narrative, or thematic criteria. This is how we remake humanity: by truly sharing our objects.

And to repeat: the key that unlocks all this is the presence of the mediator—their attention to the other, the legitimacy they grant simply by sincerely receiving what is offered. This is the key that will open everything. Presence in old age.